Dad's Best Friend, Bill Kretchmar

Growing Up with a Preacher Man 

Rev. William "Lester" Howard (1929-2021)
Mary Eulalie McLean Howard (1933-2021)

Dad's Best Friend, Bill Kretchmar (1920-2006)

____________________

by Carolyn Ann Howard

As a child, I didn't understand the dynamic a lot of relationships, especially when it came to my dad. You see, Dad didn't have friends. He, as a pastor, felt he couldn't really have "friends" per se, because he was a pastor. Growing up with Dad, even as a child, I witnessed his mental health struggles. I always thought it would be good for Dad to have a best friend. He did have one, though; he just didn't label Bill as his best friend. Because he was a pastor, and he felt he couldn't have friends.

Bill, along with his wife and family, were hometown treasures of our little resort town of Monticello, Indiana. The Kretchmars owned "The Frosty Mug" drive-in where root beer flowed freely into frosty mugs, and it was good root beer, too. It's never really been my thing, but something was different about the root beer at The Frosty Mug!

Frosty Mug was started in 1954 by Bill Kretchmar and his father-in-law, Louis Barton. I don't know why the Bartons and the Kretchmars decided to move from Hammond, Indiana to Monticello around the time they started the restaurant. I never wondered about that. Ever. Until now. Isn't it funny the things we take for granted? Especially as children. But they did move to Monticello, and I'm ever so grateful to have known them.

Perhaps their move had something to do with the First Baptist Church of Monticello, which was started about the same time as the restaurant. Click on photos to enlarge

1963 letter from Bill to my dad
Carolyn Ann Howard Family Collection

As I said in a previous blog post, it feels like I remember meeting Bill and Ruth when I was 2 years old. They were showing us the house we were going to move into on Beach Drive in Monticello. A more probable memory, however, is when we would visit Frosty Mug. I don't think we did it very often, because my father was a very proud man, and our food was always free. But, oh, those tenderloin sandwiches. So good. I was intrigued by the drive-in, and it was fun to eat in the car. Why? Because I was a child, I guess, and I was getting my very own tenderloin sandwich. Bill would serve us himself!

We were with the Kretchmars a lot. I remember that their house on the east side of Monticello, Indiana, had a laundry chute. That was so cool. I couldn't find this home's address using Ancestry, but I was pretty sure I could remember where it was. Sixty years ago, this house was spectacular.

Bill & Ruth's first Monticello home
Courtesy Google Maps
Proper attribution given

When Dad first came to Monticello to be the pastor of the First Baptist Church, they were meeting in a little storefront close to Bill & Ruth's home, on the east side of Monticello. Bill was the "moderator" in the church service, so he sat in the front of the church with Dad, facing the people. He led the congregational singing as well and sang special music quite a bit. More than once, he sang "His Eye Is on the Sparrow," moving my dad to tears every. single. time.

Front row: Dad, me, Mom,
maybe Wanda King, Mrs. Geier.
Loucille Cole is in this one as well.
Carolyn Ann Howard Family Collection

The church soon moved to its brand-new home on Beach Drive and the Kretchmars moved to 5461 E. Fairbanks Court. Google Maps does not have street view for this home, but you can see it is on the banks of the Tippecanoe River. It is also very close to the Indiana Beach amusement park.

Bill & Ruth's dream home
Monticello, IN
Google Maps with proper attribution

I remember this home well. In this home, Ruth would make "purple cows" for us, which I believe I always declined. There was a Hammond organ, or something like a Hammond organ, and over it was a beautiful family picture of Bill and Ruth with their children and with Ruth's mother. The second story overlooked the Tippecanoe so beautifully. And that living area was all glassed in, so you could see for miles around.

We would visit every July 4th, and I would watch the fireworks on their upper deck. I watched them by myself, which, watching them by yourself as a child is pretty boring. My parents would be inside the home with the Kretchmars, talking about who knows what. Grown up stuff like the restaurant business or the church business.

Something else I remember is that Ruth was always dressed to the nines with perfect make-up and hair. By her vanity, affixed to the wall, was a print of a painting. It was one of those where you can see two different things. One view was a beautiful woman sitting at her vanity looking at herself in the mirror. The other view was that of a skeleton head, and the caption "All Is Vanity." It spoke volumes to me as a young girl growing up in a legalistic household. Cosmetics were bad. Looking nice was bad. That's unfortunately what I took away from the picture, thanks to my filters. I wonder, though, what the sketch meant for Ruth.

"All Is Vanity"
By Charles Allan Gilbert
Fair Use

L to R; Ruth Kretchmar, Sharon Tolley, Edie Miller
Howard Family Collection

When I was young, a singing group from Pomona, California, did a concert at our church. They were called The Overtones, and I was star struck. They were so good. And the after party? It was at Bill & Ruth's big house on the river. These are the things that were taken away from Mom and me when Dad moved us to Evansville. It was a huge deal to be on the "in" with people like Bill & Ruth Kretchmar. That party. It was amazing. And so much fun to party with all these cool cats!

The Overtones
Fair Use

Another fun memory that so many of us from Monticello have were the steamed cheeseburgers at The Frosty Mug. Once the day center was opened up at First Baptist, these steamed cheeseburgers were on their menu, as well! Someone even posted recently on Facebook the recipe.

After we moved to Evansville in 1977, Bill & Ruth came to see my parents. I know it was around Christmastime, because, as a musician, I used to play piano for a lot of Christmas parties. I was playing a party and then after that went to Mom and Dad's to see Bill and Ruth. This is crazy, because it was probably 11 p.m. Fast forward to present day, and I need to be home on the couch by 6:00.

They probably came many times to visit my parents, and I'm just smushing all their visits together into one. It's a five-hour drive from Evansville to Monticello, though, and it's not a fun drive, either.

Ruth Kretchmar, Me, Mom, Dad
at First American Baptist, Newburgh, IN
Howard Family Collection

Mom, Dad, Bill Kretchmar
at First American Baptist, Newburgh, IN
Howard Family Collection

Dad, Stephanie, Mom, Bill, and Me
at my parents table, 1997
Don't judge my hair lol
Howard Family Collection

The last memory to share is that of the monthly skating parties our church had. We rented a roller-skating rink in Logansport, Indiana every month on a Thursday. We would meet at the church and drive together in a caravan. I had a problem learning to skate, because I was afraid of falling. Poor Bill. He decided to teach me to skate, and it turned into a several month project. I knew he was tired of helping me, but he continued anyway, and I let him. I was afraid to let go of him. He would just kindly say "pretend you're like a sack of potatoes. Just a sack of potatoes." I'm sure he was relieved when I finally learned to roller skate on my own! Those were the days. We looked so forward to those skating parties, all of us, adults and children. We'd skate from about 7 p.m. to 10 p.m. And in the middle of the skate, we'd take a break to have devotions and prayer.

My dad was amazing in finding ways to share the gospel with the people he pastored, including the one who was secretly his best friend.

© 2022 by December Moonlight Publishing, LLC

Our Arrival at Monticello, IN - 1963

Growing Up with a Preacher Man

Rev. William "Lester" Howard (1929-2021)
Mary Eulalie McLean Howard (1933-2021)

Our Arrival at Monticello, IN - 1963
____________________

by Carolyn Ann Howard

My first memory, whether planted or real, was on moving day, 1963. I was 2 years old. The memory I have is clutching my black velvet purse and probably my doll, Billy, who had apparently been given to me as a gift. Billy was a Madame Alexander knock-off, and she was my best friend. I was closer to that doll than to anyone else. In this memory, I was walking on a sidewalk, heading toward our car. We didn't have car seats in 1963 or seatbelts in the back seat. I made it out alive, though.

The second memory, whether planted or real, is that of Bill and Ruth Kretchmar showing us around the house we were going to move into. It was located on Beach Drive in Monticello, Indiana.  My father had taken the position there as pastor for the American Baptist Church in this small resort town. The church had been started about five years prior, and they were meeting in a store front on the east side of Monticello. My father's mission, and he accepted it, was to build a church there on Beach Drive that would become The First American Baptist Church of Monticello.

I don't remember anything else after that until they were ready to begin preparations for building the church. The first project was moving our house back from the street to make room for the church and its parking lot. My only memory was of Moving Day. This was in 1965. I was 4 years old. I was crying - bawling - looking for perhaps my mother. I don't know what was wrong, but I'm sure I was clutching Billy. It might have been Mr. Mann who found me. Someone who wasn't my mother calmed me that day. Click on photos to enlarge

Moving that house was genius. My father was very good at building things. He and the church members built a basement that the house would stand on. This made our house huge. One of the additional rooms added - that would eventually become my bedroom when I got older - was big enough for a bed, desk, chest of drawers, dresser, perfume table, cedar chest, and a rocking chair. Even with all that, there was still plenty of room for me to sit on the floor and play cards - an activity that got me through the stress of being "Rev. Howard's daughter". But... I'm getting ahead of myself here!

After moving day, our house also had enough room for a playroom for me and a huge bedroom for my brother. We had a shower room and laundry room in the basement. We also had a living room in the basement with dark wood paneling. In the evenings, when the sun was setting and the wind was blowing through our many trees, it would shine into the window, casting moving shadows onto the wood paneling. To make things even better, someone had put a plastic Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer in the sill.

Mom sitting in our green chair in the downstairs living room
Carolyn Ann Howard Family Collection

The rest of the walk-out basement contained a huge kitchen and dining room with cabinets all around. And a pantry! Upstairs were three bedrooms, a piano room for me, a full bathroom, my mother's beauty shop and a formal living room. I always remembered that this house was one of those with two front doors. The first front door allowed visitors into the formal living room without letting them into the rest of the house. So the house could be a mess, except for the formal living room, and visitors would never know it was a mess! But our house was never a mess. My mother kept it tidy and clean, almost obsessively so. As for the memory of the two front doors, it is a false memory. Clearly the pictures above show just one front door.

We also had a large attic that had a real walkable floor - probably installed by my handyman father. And it was tall enough to stand in. This was my dad's space that he called his "study". He kept all his books there and, looking back, all his mess. I have been told that men like to have all their stuff out where they can see it. In this space, my father could have all his stuff out. His papers, his booklets, his books, his brochures, and his pictures. A plus for me, there was a small roof outside the attic where I could sunbathe and no one could see me. I don't remember if my mother ever went up to the attic to clean or otherwise, but I don't think she did.

My mom in the back of our big house
Notice the windows above in the attic
Carolyn Ann Howard Family Collection

We lived on 7 acres of land PLUS behind the home was a large, wooded area and behind that, the old, huge Monticello City Cemetery. It was heaven living on that property. I would spend most of my time in the woods and in that cemetery. It is probably why I became a genealogist. I would walk through the cemetery and study the stones and wonder what their stories were. I still do that today.

I lived in Monticello with my family for 14 years and enjoyed all the pleasures of living in a resort town that featured twin lakes - Lake Shafer and Lake Freeman. It was here that I experienced so much pain and suffering, joy and sorrow, fun and happiness. My experiences here, growing up as a preacher's kid, gave shape to my entire life. That life in the end is very happy and satisfying and fun. But it took a while to get there.

© 2022 by December Moonlight Publishing, LLC